[ let them talk. he'd ream them another one if they started spreading rumors. just look at his Dajiu and Hanguang-jun. if they can do— no, his brain is not going down that road. the point of the matter is... it's none of their business anyway. the heat simmering in his gut feels odd in contrast to his anxiety and he swallows, even as he does his best to take deep breaths as per Sizhui's instructions.
if... if he liked Sizhui, and he's not saying he does, (but you do says a small voice in his ear), but if he did... he wouldn't let some petty gossip spreaders get in the way.
the more he thinks about it, with his eyes closed, breathing in tandem with his companion, the more he can't get it out of his head. the proximity, the heat... the feeling that he kind of wants to kiss him and he suddenly blinks his eyes open wide. what? he wants to. oh.
ow.
he shifts to turn his head slightly to watch Sizhui's face, swallowing down a lump in his throat. oh. he opens his mouth to reply, but struggles to find his voice until something cracks and he can speak. ]
What... what about you? Your heart is beating really fast.
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if... if he liked Sizhui, and he's not saying he does, (but you do says a small voice in his ear), but if he did... he wouldn't let some petty gossip spreaders get in the way.
the more he thinks about it, with his eyes closed, breathing in tandem with his companion, the more he can't get it out of his head. the proximity, the heat... the feeling that he kind of wants to kiss him and he suddenly blinks his eyes open wide. what? he wants to. oh.
ow.
he shifts to turn his head slightly to watch Sizhui's face, swallowing down a lump in his throat. oh. he opens his mouth to reply, but struggles to find his voice until something cracks and he can speak. ]
What... what about you? Your heart is beating really fast.