[oh, why does that make his breath catch? he somehow manages stifling the gasp, swallows around the sudden dryness in his throat then he exhales a slow, measured breath, ignoring the goosebumps rising on his skin despite how warm he is. the way dick says babe certainly isn't helping matters any.]
You're the only other person I know, remember? [there's an obvious confidence in his words, something that falters for a split second at dick's suggestion. does he have jason wrapped around his finger? considering how sizhui need only use his words most times, many people would say so, but he's unaware of the actual power he holds.] Yes, [he agrees, barely above a whisper.] It would seem that I do. Jason listens earnestly to me, doesn't he?
[ A half beat stretches between them, holding something that he can't quite place a finger on. There's a tone to Sizhui's voice, quiet and shaky and intimate, along with the admission and reminder that Dick is the only other person he knows. Right. That’s something easily forgotten. Dick thinks he picks up on a dep exhale that makes him press the phone a little closer to his ear. ]
Seems like it. [ If the single time he's seen Jason and Sizhui interact is anything to judge by, Sizhui has more of a hold on Jason than anyone else does--at least, surely, more than he does. ] He listens to you, doesn’t he? He never listens to me. [ It’s not a whine or a complaint, just stated simply and plainly like a fact. ] What’s your secret?
[it's a wonder that's all dick hears because these cell phones pick up practically everything; the true miracle is sizhui still has such control, even while pretty heavily intoxicated. for the most part anyway, taking the breathy, satisfied sigh into account, which says more than words ever could.]
Please hold a moment, [then he sets the phone face-down (smart!) and shucks off his sweater, tosses it aside, reaches to pick the phone back up as he's loosening his hair.] I listen in return, do my best to hear him out. Sometimes, we argue because he does things I don't like, but after I explain, once he understands there are unavoidable consequences... [sizhui momentarily trails off remembering his punishment from when they had gotten caught, the pain that'd followed, how many weeks it had taken to heal.] I'm also not trying to control him. You and I both know that isn't possible, although— [another beat of consideration then, caution thrown to the wind, he segues onward.] He seems to like my affection. And the praise.
[ There’s the rustling. Dick holds his breath as it comes through the phone, and Sizhui sounds somehow satisfied with whatever he did. Is he--taking his clothes off? He really shouldn’t be reacting like this. It’s wrong. He shouldn’t be feeling the telltale interest stirring in his gut.
There’s so much to unpack there but all Dick can think about are the implications of what Sizhui is saying. There’s more to it, too, from listening to giving in, to consequences and control. Dick doesn’t like to give up control and it’s for that exact reason that Jason is such a challenge. Maybe it’s an experience thing. ]
You know your way around it then, right? We’re talking— [ Again, not doing anything wrong here. Just talking, but he can’t help the tone his voice takes, smooth and low. Half of him actually wants to know how, and the other half is just plain curious.] Reward and punishment here, right? How’d you figure out it works with Jason if it's not a control thing?
[he took his sweatshirt off (which is actually jason's if they're being technical) and that's it! there's still plenty else to account for: skinny-style jeans, oversized t-shirt, the open button-up he has over that— wait, no, it's gone now, too. yet somehow, he's still overheated despite having shed those layers. he huffs, rolls the hairtie onto his wrist, kneads his fingers across his scalp with a pleased hum.] Right.
[well, maybe not entirely? but sure. he considers rewording, second-guesses whenever dick's voice lowers, mouth abruptly going dry at the inquiry. talking is all they're doing and it's one-hundred-percent harmless, yes? (has dick ever tried giving up control before? how convenient, sizhui's used to being in both positions.)] I think part of it's being rewarded for even trying. [an almost too long silence then he continues,] Or for doing something unexpected?
To be fair, I'm still learning myself as well. [a second, somehow even longer pause and he sighs,] Sometimes, it's as simple as batting my eyelashes and telling him what a good boy he is. Other times, as you said, there's punishment where necessary.
Right, you’re learning, but it sounds like you know at least some things. Is this all--from experience? [ Because Sizhui says it like he knows it, and Dick is curious. Curiosity killed the cat, he knows, but in his current inebriated state, feeling warm and fuzzy with the lick of heat starting somewhere low inside him, he can’t help but ask. It’s wrong to be thinking about Jason this way--to be thinking of Sizhui this way, but the reward, the punishment, the words good boy brings an altogether different image. From the last time they met, he hadn’t been under the impression that Sizhui was particularly experienced though. ]
Oh. [oh. is dick asking how many people he's ‘been’ with by inquiring about experience? now that it's finally clicked, sizhui thoughtfully chews his lower lip, unable to keep the half-smile from creeping across his face as he considers.] He's been my only experience. [for now, goes unsaid, though he doesn't hesitate to continue despite the questionable heat pooling in his belly. (they shouldn't be discussing this, it isn't really dick's place – or even his own to be revealing these things– and yet.)] Jason was my first, but I come from a clan that's big on reward for good behavior and punishment when things are wrong. Sometimes even when things aren't wrong.
[ Only experience. Now that thought has his breath pausing in his throat, eyes widening and staring across the room. The phone’s still pressed to his ear and he wonders if Sizhui can hear shudder of breath that sifts out between parted lips. So Sizhui gave Jason his virginity. That shouldn’t be surprising, given how pure Sizhui seems. But it begs the question starting to emerge in his head: how is Jason when taking someone’s virginity? Did Jason even know?
He shouldn't be thinking about this. Sizhui moves on to continue to talk about good behaviour and punishment and rewards and Dick is thankful for the topic change. ]
No wonder you can handle him if your clan’s so tough, but—when things aren’t wrong? Why would you get punished?
[sizhui hears him, of course he does, and he has to hold his own breath to make certain he doesn't do anything ridiculous. is dick thinking about them? about what he and jason did back home, how he'd given one of the most important parts of himself? the hand not holding his phone lifts, cups around his mouth, breath exhaling slow and steady from his nose. perhaps, if they're both lucky, he'll tell. besides, is there really something so wrong when thinking about it? (inappropriate thoughts aside.)
honestly, he almost prefers it because having to explain how strict his clan is feels odd. and also a bit worrisome, but something tells him dick might understand.]
Let me ask you something, [he begins, adjusting his position so he's propped against the arm of the couch, legs drawn up, free hand on his midsection again.] Do you think kissing someone is punishable?
[ Sizhui’s soft breath sifts through the phone, and the warm, intimate sound has his eyes falling open as he drops his head back down. His thoughts drift along with an ease coursing through his body from the alcohol, simple and unguarded. ]
Kissing someone? [ His voice is low and quiet, a pause conveying his confusion before he answers. ] No, I don’t—not by any rules I know of. Were you—do you think it’s punishable?
[while he waits for an answer, his attention flickers to the styrofoam cup nearby, half-lidded eyes considering before he shifts to pick it up. sizhui sucks down the remaining liquid, sets it aside on the floor then leans back again.]
Not at all, [he answers truthfully.] And yet, I was still punished for it. [just to answer the half-question dick about asked there, but here's something that might be a curveball.] If I said I want to kiss you, however, would that be punishable?
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houseofsushi2020-05-22 10:34 pm
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You're the only other person I know, remember? [there's an obvious confidence in his words, something that falters for a split second at dick's suggestion. does he have jason wrapped around his finger? considering how sizhui need only use his words most times, many people would say so, but he's unaware of the actual power he holds.] Yes, [he agrees, barely above a whisper.] It would seem that I do. Jason listens earnestly to me, doesn't he?
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Seems like it. [ If the single time he's seen Jason and Sizhui interact is anything to judge by, Sizhui has more of a hold on Jason than anyone else does--at least, surely, more than he does. ] He listens to you, doesn’t he? He never listens to me. [ It’s not a whine or a complaint, just stated simply and plainly like a fact. ] What’s your secret?
no subject
Please hold a moment, [then he sets the phone face-down (smart!) and shucks off his sweater, tosses it aside, reaches to pick the phone back up as he's loosening his hair.] I listen in return, do my best to hear him out. Sometimes, we argue because he does things I don't like, but after I explain, once he understands there are unavoidable consequences... [sizhui momentarily trails off remembering his punishment from when they had gotten caught, the pain that'd followed, how many weeks it had taken to heal.] I'm also not trying to control him. You and I both know that isn't possible, although— [another beat of consideration then, caution thrown to the wind, he segues onward.] He seems to like my affection. And the praise.
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There’s so much to unpack there but all Dick can think about are the implications of what Sizhui is saying. There’s more to it, too, from listening to giving in, to consequences and control. Dick doesn’t like to give up control and it’s for that exact reason that Jason is such a challenge. Maybe it’s an experience thing. ]
You know your way around it then, right? We’re talking— [ Again, not doing anything wrong here. Just talking, but he can’t help the tone his voice takes, smooth and low. Half of him actually wants to know how, and the other half is just plain curious.] Reward and punishment here, right? How’d you figure out it works with Jason if it's not a control thing?
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[well, maybe not entirely? but sure. he considers rewording, second-guesses whenever dick's voice lowers, mouth abruptly going dry at the inquiry. talking is all they're doing and it's one-hundred-percent harmless, yes? (has dick ever tried giving up control before? how convenient, sizhui's used to being in both positions.)] I think part of it's being rewarded for even trying. [an almost too long silence then he continues,] Or for doing something unexpected?
To be fair, I'm still learning myself as well. [a second, somehow even longer pause and he sighs,] Sometimes, it's as simple as batting my eyelashes and telling him what a good boy he is. Other times, as you said, there's punishment where necessary.
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He shouldn't be thinking about this. Sizhui moves on to continue to talk about good behaviour and punishment and rewards and Dick is thankful for the topic change. ]
No wonder you can handle him if your clan’s so tough, but—when things aren’t wrong? Why would you get punished?
no subject
honestly, he almost prefers it because having to explain how strict his clan is feels odd. and also a bit worrisome, but something tells him dick might understand.]
Let me ask you something, [he begins, adjusting his position so he's propped against the arm of the couch, legs drawn up, free hand on his midsection again.] Do you think kissing someone is punishable?
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Kissing someone? [ His voice is low and quiet, a pause conveying his confusion before he answers. ] No, I don’t—not by any rules I know of. Were you—do you think it’s punishable?
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Not at all, [he answers truthfully.] And yet, I was still punished for it. [just to answer the half-question dick about asked there, but here's something that might be a curveball.] If I said I want to kiss you, however, would that be punishable?